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    Polcompball Anarchy Wiki

    Craupatkin vs. Plenderplar: Fight for the fate of the omniverse

    Cast:
    The Omni-council
    OmniFaith-icon.png Omni-Faith
    Omni-Back-icon.png Omni-Back
    Omni-06Icon.png Omni-06
    Omni-FreeIcon.png Omni-Free
    Omni-ForceIcon.png Omni-Force
    Omni-Sin (Teal).png Omni-Sin
    File:Omni Hive Red.png Omni-Hive

    Plenderplaristan
    Neo-Plenderplarism-icon.png Neo-Plenderplarism - The BB and leader of Plenderplaristan
    Plen.png Plenderplarism - Servants of Plenderplar
    Plencapf.png PlenderCapitalism - Minister of finances
    Plunderplarism - Admiral of the Plenderplaristans space force
    PlenderQuarkism.png PlenderQuarkism - Head of the science department

    The resistance
    Aeirin.png Aeirinism


    Bohmism-icon.png Böhmism
    Rutabaga.png Rutabagism
    Nazcaptransh.png Heinrich-Cheungism
    Moonlit.png Moonlitism
    Neo-YugoslavPartisanIcon.png Neo-YugoslavPartisanism
    NeoButterism.png Neo-Butterism
    Bsaheedism-icon.png Bsaheedism
    Ego-Kakistocracy.png Demolism
    AaronSH.png Aaronism
    Immorox.pngImmorxism
    File:Potato-Iconalt.png Potato6132ism


    Him
    Craupatkin.png Craupatkinism



    Chapter one: Rise of Neoplenderplarism

    at Plendeplaristans command-ship

    Neo-Plenderplarism-icon.png Neo-Plenderplarism: Proles, BB Informs you that we have found the way to kill the non-existantful gods and become eternalful god of omniverse
    Plencapf.png PlenderCapitalism: How will you do this oh plechrist?
    Neo-Plenderplarism-icon.png : We will use paradoxes to doubleplusdestroy their unexistence. Set course to the omniful council.
    Plunderplarism: Doubleplusyes master

    At the council:

    OmniFaith-icon.png Omni-Faith: I call this meeting of the omni-council started. One of you proposed that all mollecules in the universe should be changed to a LSD-based sustanance. Who votes in favor?

    Omni Free Pink.png Omni-Free and Omni-Sin (Teal).png Omni-Sin: raise hands

    OmniFaith-icon.png : Opposed?

    Everyone else: Raises hand

    OmniFaith-icon.png : It is settled then, all molllecules will not be replaced with LSD
    Omni Free Pink.png : What about DMT?
    OmniFaith-icon.png : The council has been clear.
    File:Omni Hive Red.png Omni-Hive: We see a ship approaching.
    Omni Force Orange.png Omni-Force: Who dares interrupt our council?

    Plenderplars command ship lands and he comes out off it with knock-off, copyright-free version of Imperial march playing in the background

    Omni Force Orange.png: HOW DARE YOU ENTER OUR DOMAIN MORTAL? Pulls out a giant flaming axe
    Neo-Plenderplarism-icon.png: We have come to unperson you.
    OmniFaith-icon.png: How dare you? You have no chance pathetic insect!
    Neo-Plenderplarism-icon.png: Observe. Hey, Omni-Force.
    Omni Force Orange.png: WHAT IS IT, SLIME?
    Neo-Plenderplarism-icon.png: Your doubleplusunreal non-ideology seeks tounperson god to become one, but you are a god and now are the god to be unpersoned.
    Omni Force Orange.png: Fuck. kills himself
    Neo-Plenderplarism-icon.png: Omni-back, you want to return backwise, yet every second, time pushes forwardwise, you have failed.
    OmniBackIcon.png Omni-Back: NOO! Disentagrates
    Neo-Plenderplarism-icon.png: Omni-06, you want to progress forwardwise infinitewise, considering I have already killed two gods, wouldnt we be the doublepluslogical progress?
    Omni 06 Icon.png Omni-06: Flawless logic Destroys himself
    Neo-Plenderplarism-icon.png: Omni-Hive, you want to incorporate every living being into one. Why dont you just merge with us?
    File:Omni Hive Red.png Omni-Hive: We shall proceed Is absorbed by Neoplenderplarism
    Neo-Plenderplarism-icon.png: Omni-sin, your doubleplusunreal non-ideology wants to kill everyone to make one person can do whatever he wants. Why dont you start with yourself.
    Omni-Sin (Teal).png Omni-Sin: Whatever, a universe that isnt made out of drugs isnt one worth livng in anyways. Dies
    OmniFaith-icon.png: Stop this, you have no idea what are you doing, you will weaken the borders of the omniverse and unleash force no being can stop.
    Neo-Plenderplarism-icon.png: Omni-faith, you dont believe in yourself, you know you are, therefore are a heretic to your ownwise faith and must unperson yourself.
    OmniFaith-icon.png: You will regret! Smites himself
    Neo-Plenderplarism-icon.png: Omni-free, you exist only in minds of people, without omni-faith, you dont exist.
    Omni Free Pink.png: Fucking LARP... Disappears
    Neo-Plenderplarism-icon.png: Prepare the Plender-fleet, Omniverse is mine to conquer.

    Somewhere in the Void:

    Craupatkin.png Craupatkinism: I hear screams of dying gods, who dares awake the ancient one from his slumber?


    === Chapter two: War of LARP ===
    In the grim darkness of the far future, Plendetplars forces advance as resistance is trying to stop them without succes. Recently. the resistance has organized a mission to find an important prisoner and bring him to them for their plans to destroy Plenderplar.

    Bsaheedism-icon.png Bsaheedism: We are reaching our base. We should call the HQ that the mission was a succes.

     : Dont speak too soon. Plenderplars forces have finnaly caught up to us!

    Plen.png Plenderplarism: Doubleplusstop crimethinkers or we will open fire.
    Moonlit.png Moonlitism: You will never get us alive, LARPers!
    Neo-Plenderplarism-icon.png: I doubleplusunLARP
    Bsaheedism-icon.png: Fuck, hes here!
    Aeirin.png Aeirinism: I will slow him down! You run with the prisoner!
    Moonlit.png: We cant leave you here!
    Suddenly, Aerin turns to Plenderplar and begins to speak:
    Aeirin.png: Dwaddy Pwanderpwaw pwease dont kiww me, I have bween a bwad girl, you have to pwunish me, UWU.
    Neo-Plenderplarism-icon.png: Doubleplusuncold. Arrest her and put her to my personal torture chambers.
    AesQuark.png :Vomits and dies
    Moonlit.png: What happened to Quark?
    Bsaheedism-icon.png: He died of cringe! We have to go, their death cant be in vain!
    Neo-Plenderplarism-icon.png:Unperson them!
    Plen.png:Yes Master.
    Moonlit.png: Gets shot
    Neo-Plenderplarism-icon.png: Walks up to bleeding Moonlit on the ground This is what happens when you defy us!
    Moonlit.png: Fucking je....Dies
    Neo-Plenderplarism-icon.png: Wait where is the last one?

    ==== At the base: ====
    NeoButterism.png Neo-Butterism: Holy shit! You made it!
    Bsaheedism-icon.png: Yes, but everyone else is dead or captured.
    Rutabaga.png Rutabagism:Fallen shall be forever remebered as resistances finest.
    Bohmism-icon.png Böhmism: Do you have the prisoner?
    Bsaheedism-icon.png:Yes
    Bohmism-icon.png: Alright, everyone go to the main meeting room. The ritual is ready!

    Nazcaptransh.png Heinrich-Cheungism: We must talk first. I dont think the ritual is safe.
    Neo-YugoslavPartisanIcon.png Neo-YugoslavPartisanism: I agree but there is no other choice. We have to do it for the greater good.
    Rutabaga.png: What about the moral implications? Can we really execute a child to save more people?
    Bsaheedism-icon.png: You havent seen the prisoner, havent you?
    NeoButterism.png: We should take a vote if we will make the ritual or not.
    Nazcaptransh.png: Fine. All in favor?

    Bohmism-icon.pngNeoButterism.pngBsaheedism-icon.pngNeo-YugoslavPartisanIcon.png: Raise hands

    Nazcaptransh.png: All opposed?

    Nazcaptransh.png Rutabaga.png: Raise hands

    Rutabaga.png: Alright then, we are killing a child.
    Bohmism-icon.png: Based. Bring forth the prisoner!
    Ego-Kakistocracy.png Demolism: hI guyS!!!LLL111!!
    Rutabaga.png: Nevermind, this one deserves it.
    Neo-YugoslavPartisanIcon.png: May the ritual commence!

    Everyone chanting:
    He who sleeps in ground below
    Awake your flesh, bone and soul
    These who rape cities and burn babies shall pay!
    We praise thee! The Craupatkins name!

    NeoButterism.png: Pulls out an ornate knife and slits Demolisms throat.
    Ego-Kakistocracy.png: Bleeds out

    Suddenly a hole in reality opens and a large, muscular, male figure steps out from it.

    Craupatkin.png: I am Craupatkin, the vanquisher of antifa, the destroyer of commies and speaker of facts. Who dares summon me to the mortal realm?

    To be continued...



    Coming soon (Or later):

    Chapter three: A new challanger approaches

    Chapter four: Massacre at Plenderpolis

    Chapter five: The final battle

    Chapter six: Long live the king


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